Last week, HippieHusband resigned from his postdoctoral position. Although he had money for another year at SmallUniversity, he has decided to seek professional opportunities elsewhere.
I know HippieHusband is grateful to have had the chance to work with his direct supervisor. His direct supervisor is a very good scientist and a nice guy cemented by a sintering situation. And yes there are always forks in the road and sometimes we take the wrong one.
If you want to understand the possible twists and turns in a postdoctoral story then a good place to start is the beginning and follow the narrative arc to its conclusion.
We're both grateful for HippieHusband's experience because it has made us more attuned to the signposts of the workplace environment. Our sense of smell was dulled when we first came to visit SmallUniversity because I was a newly minted PhD and HippieHusband was still in the midst of his. And so we ignored the subtle fragrance of nail polish remover and drank the wine nonetheless.
I am continuing to work at SmallUniversity because my research is going well and I have a wonderful relationship with my supervisor.
As a direct result of these experiences I have tried to offer grad students out there some advice here, here, and here.
Don't take it at your own risk.
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6 comments:
Sorry to hear! Is he looking to remain in the same area as you, or is he also considering opportunities at a distance- even if that might mean some separation between you two?
I'm glad tht hippiehusband has put his mental health first. Having been in a situation where the supervisor is great but the environment sucks for a variety of reasons, I know how hard it is to decide to quit. I hope he is able to find a position that will enable you and him to live in a place together (vs him having to move cities)
@Chris
No he's looking at a LargeCity. And if he gets a job somewhere, we'll have to decide at that point what happens to my work situation. Unlike many academic couples, we made a decision long ago not to work and live in separate cities.
@SM
Yes mental health is really important and I think it takes courage to quit a bad situation.
Academics are pretty self-serving. It's pretty clear from the details of the stors, whose interests this "nice" supervisor serves.
@Anonymous
While I appreciate the sentiment, I think that these kind of generalizations are unfair.
That said, The Godfather has created an environment of mistrust in this department at SmallUniversity. And so the choices and behaviour of HippieHusband's direct supervisor (and others) is an immediate consequence of that environment. I can't say how I would have responded given the same situation. It's a tough call.
I'm sorry to hear, although maybe it is a great decision in the end but the energy invested and spent is tough to recover. It's hard when it has been a rocky and bad thing for awhile, it makes it a bit infested. I hope HH gets a better place to work in soon.
Another part of me thinks "well, at least he tried but you can't make other people behave". It still is a hard decision though.
Hope that you and him can make the situation better for both of you and the you two feel good!
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