Small world network of a small town

Today, I was walking on my way to the OnlyHippieCafe to do some work. And I ran into three people I knew. No matter what you do here, you always run into someone you know. And if you don't run into someone you know, it's more than likely that the person sitting at the next table knows someone you know quite well.


A few days ago, HippieHusband and I went out for dinner with ForBetterOrWorse and his wife. ForBetterOrForWorse was a post-doc at SmallUniversity who looks exactly like the cartoon version of the husband (John Patterson) in Lynn Johnston's For Better or For Worse). I used to have a blogpost on this guy and his interactions in the department but since I was outed, I have deleted a number of older posts. ForBetterOrForWorse is no longer a post-doc in the department because his contract ended, so for us, this couple qualified as "the outside the university" friends. We were so thrilled to have dinner with this couple because they were disconnected to SmallUniversity. Apparently, disconnected isn't really what we wanted. We spent the entire night bitching and ranting about postdocdom and academia. Most of it involved updating them on HippieHusband's outrageous situation.

It turns out, no surprise, they really aren't that disconnected - in fact, some of the recurring characters in this ridiculous fiction of HippieHusband's are people they socialize with. I'll admit that ForBetterOrForWorse and his wife really don't qualify as "outside the university" friends.

This led HippieHusband and I to think about out how we could make friends with people who had no connection to SmallUniversity.
I'm not sure that it's even possible to have friends that have no association with the university. Here in SmallTown, I swear, it's not 6 degrees of separation but more like 1-2 degrees.

Now, if I HippieHusband and I had kids, SmallTown would be a great place to meet "disconnected" people because it's populated by people with kids (pun intended).

As is often the case with small world networks, it is characterized by cliques or sub-networks. So in SmallTown, I think of two, possibly three cliques: the Hippies, the "intellectual" elite (SmallUniversity), and the Fundamental Christians. Within each of these groups, any one person is highly connected to any other person.

Although I'm sure that these types of subnetworks existed in BigCity, Canada, I was less impacted by their presence on a day to day basis. At least while at LargeUniversityinCanada, I had tons of friends who had 'nothing' to do with the University. This was due, in part, to the fact that I could join different groups and meet a diversity of people. And if they did have a connection, it felt so far removed that I never felt my life was small.

And that really is the issue. SmallTown just seems to be getting smaller.

There is one good thing about a small town that isn't always true in the big city. People take the time to care. On Friday of last week, HippieHusband and I were "stranded" because I had lost the car key. I couldn't for the life of me remember where or when I last had them. And if you knew me, this lost key business would not be surprising at all. Here's a good example of past key transgressions:

One day, I was sitting in my office, lost in thesis, when BestFriend called. At the time, BF was living in another BigCity in Canada. Without so much as a Hello, how are you? She asked if I had lost my keys.

"No. Of course not." I said, rolling my eyes.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, they're right he- Oh shit I've lost my keys."
"They're in the women's washroon on the third floor."
"WTF, how do you know?"

Apparently an email had gone out across the gradslist, stating that a set of keys had been found in the women's washroom on the third floor of the building that I worked in.

Good grief.

I figured that the car key had entered The Darkroom of the Universe. And well, frankly, it was one less thing to worry about now.

But on Sunday, believe it or not, someone put up a notice, saying "Car key found. Please call --- --- ----."

So I called. The person at the other end had left it in a desk drawer just outside the door of our building. If this was LargeUniversityinCanada, that desk would be in someone's apartment as a "found item."

And all of a sudden I realized that yes, SmallTown was in fact small, and yes there wasn't a whole lot of culture or restaurants, and yes, it would be hard to find "outside university" friends, and yes, people here aren't really that bad and they do take the time to care.

But thank god, it's only temporary.